How Tiger Could Get Me Tickets To The Winter Classic

Help a sistah out, Harvey!

So much like everyone out there, I want to go to the Winter Classic. Why wouldn’t I? Ok, it’ll be freezing it and I’ll be surrounded by yahoos or people who have no idea what’s going on. But it’s a chance to be a part of something special. It’s history. I’d be stupid to not want to go.

With that said, I know the only way I will be getting into the game will be either by opening my wallet and shelling out the cash for the ticket or if I have to strap the kneepads on and hope that *insert person affiliated with the NHL name here* follows thru after I take one for the team.  I sure as hell won’t be given a press pass, so I might as well get use to the idea of being out 500 bucks sooner rather than later.

Now I have a decent paying job and with Christmas just around the corner – I’ll be able to afford a ticket. But why spend my money? When I can buy it with someone else’s.  So the wheels were spinning last night and while thinking about how I could make a few bucks quick, it dawned on me that I should take advantage of the Tiger Woods scandal. And the idea of me being another notch on his bedpost isn’t that far-fetched. Please, you think he really banged a Perkins waitress? Homegirl was looking for a payday. And why shouldn’t I? I mean, I DID meet Tiger during the Ryder Cup and granted we only had a 5 mins conversation about the traffic – but who cares! That’s not important and not the point. The point is, I met Tiger and it’s high time I take advantage of that meeting when the getting is good.

So I, Cameron Frye, am admitting to having an ‘encounter’ with Tiger Woods. You want all of the gory details of our 5 mins of romance during the 1999 Ryder Cup – it’ll cost you.

The price you ask? Two, count’em 1-2, tickets to the Winter Classic at Fenway Park. I think that’s a fair deal. Don’t you? It’s a win win situation. Well, except for Tiger’s wife & the embarrassment I’ll bring my parents. But they’re use to it by now.

So Harvey Levin from TMZ, shoot me an email and I’ll tell you a Tiger ‘tale’ (GET IT? See what I did there? Comedy gold, people!), that’ll make your Goldilocks lad’s hair curl up in horror. I’ll be awaiting your email – strike while the iron is hot, Harvey!

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4 thoughts on “How Tiger Could Get Me Tickets To The Winter Classic

  1. KofC December 16, 2009 at 5:30 pm Reply

    I just sent a tweet about how my friend came to Chicago from Boston (not just for the Classic), stood outside Wrigley, and someone sold him a ticket at face value. But your idea is much more entertaining!

  2. kzf1 December 16, 2009 at 5:40 pm Reply

    You know, that could work. Since the game is on NBC, the network could send Meredith Viera to interview you with the Green Monster as the backdrop.

  3. Kathi December 16, 2009 at 8:36 pm Reply

    From the look of things, Tiger talking to you about ‘traffic’ could have been his way of picking you up!! Sell it, Baby, Sell it!!!!

  4. bruins22 December 16, 2009 at 11:34 pm Reply

    Literally laughed out loud while reading this. Nearly in tears. “Please, you think he really banged a Perkins waitress? Homegirl was looking for a payday” LOVE IT!

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